Believe

Before I get onto all the sappy stuff, here is a quick status on Samuel: He has grown 2 inches and gained so much weight! He has rolls now! As of December 26, he weighs 11 pounds, 3.9 ounces. The doctor at PCH said his weight gain is "phenomenal". We are doing breathing treatments once or twice a day along with some chest physical therapy, also called CPT. He doesn't mind the treatments so much right now, which is the purpose. While he doesn't NEED them, it won't hurt anything and will get us all in the routine if he ever does need them. Aside from the CF concerns, Samuel is doing excellent! He's starting to sleep longer hours, a welcome relief for me and Kevin. We aren't looking forward to next week as he is getting shots on Monday and Friday. First, his general immunizations and then his second RSV vaccine. 5 pokes total. Again, I'm not excited about it.

During this Christmas season, it has been refreshing to remember how good God has been to us this past year. We have been so blessed, it seems like something else is working in our favor every time we turn around. While I have never had to worry so much about where my next meal is coming from, I'm experiencing how God is a provider on a different level. Since that first day at Phoenix Children's when it seemed the world was crumbling out from under me, God was providing. It seems that this condition can cause a financial strain, as most can, and I have decided to stay home to take care of Samuel instead of exposing him to all the grime that is inevitable with most day care operations. We are enrolled in a program called CareFirst, offered by the drug company that gives us Samuel's digestive enzymes through his second birthday. These are essential for him. We've also received a hospital grade air purifier, and his air compressor was for a nominal fee. There are countless ways we have been blessed through the generosity of others and for that, I will forever be thankful.

I don't know how many there are, but there are people all over that have been praying for Samuel and our family. Even if I didn't know because we were told, I would still know because there has been some unexplainable peace and strength I've been experiencing. There is absolutely no way I could get through the day on my own. Thank you for your prayers for our family. And thanks be to God for His grace and mercy that is truly new with each morning.

This year at church and in our family we have a theme: Believe. We've never had a family theme before but this year it was called for. Mark 9:23 says "If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth." Since the day we received Samuel's diagnosis, we have believed that God is capable of a complete healing. I know He is able. And I DO believe. But in the very next verse, Mark 9:24, the father of the sick child responds to Jesus saying, "Lord, I believe; help my unbelief." Just his statement tells me there was still a shred of doubt. Oh, how I can relate to that man! I would love nothing more than for Samuel to be healed and not be plagued by the problems of cystic fibrosis. That being said, if God should choose NOT to heal Samuel, that is OK. It's OK with me because I know, no matter what, Samuel will be used to God's glory. He is a miracle ANYWAY! And he's not named Samuel (meaning "asked of God") by accident. I don't think God would have given him to us if there wasn't a divine plan for his life. Just him being here, he is a miracle. I don't know how and I don't know when but someday, somehow, Samuel will be used by God and to His glory. I just can't wait to see how it's going to happen!